Nothing motivates me to write (and write well) more than seeing (or reading)either an outstanding piece of work or an outstanding piece of crap. I finished writing Eastern Sunset in a manic/sleepless week, encouraged by the elegance and cinematography of The Painted Veil.
"Oh Kitty, I brought you here so you could die of cholera for being such a cheating whore; I never thought we'd...fall in love."I began drafting Old Mike, New Christine based on the June 2010 GQ article of the same title (obviously my title is tentative). I reevaluated my scenes' juxtaposition in Short Life of a Beard after sitting through a grueling and incoherent 88 minutes of The Love Guru (wtf Meyers?).
endured for educational purposes:
Couple's Retreat -ok, I'm not gonna lie, I was actually looking forward to this. Tropical location plus Favreau and Vaughn, it had some potential ingredients for a funny night in. But as their last night unravelled and loose parts were haphazardly duct taped together, I was left feeling like I was watching a night of amateur improv at John Rennie High School again: "Ok can I have a suggestion for...a sucky ending to an overbudgeted piece of poo...?"
Observe and Report -I may have enjoyed Paul Blart:Mall Cop more than this work of a regular fave, Seth Rogan. What the heck happened hear? I have no idea and I think that was the problem. I wasnt sure where plot points were or what was the driving force of the story -main's secret dream of becoming a cop, what he'd do to get the girl, his need to find the flasher <- oops spoiler alert, but who the eff cares. I also battled with myself trying to find ways to at the very least sympathyze with actual douchebag Ronnie Barnhardt. Still working on developing an undeserved sense of accomplishment *sarcasm*
The Invention of Lying -what was Ricky Gervais and Matthew Robinson smoking while they wrote this? Oh no I get it, this had the potential to be as exaggerated/shallow funny as Bruce Almighty, but it took a weird turn as soon as the director demanded an Oscar calibre performance from Gervais that rivaled Sean Penn in Milk. As soon as their frou frou, dimple faced, honest, pretend world was cast under the shadow of our actual World's theology and religion it wasnt funny anymor <- oops spoiler alert again! but that ok because you shouldn't see this movie anyway. It shoved me back to my reality without a meager refund of the 40 minutes of life I would never get back.
and last and absolutely least:
"If you open this box it will unleash a series of disorganized and perplexing events that will ruin
date night for couples all over the world...you will still get paid your millions despite your acting."
"If you open this box it will unleash a series of disorganized and perplexing events that will ruin
date night for couples all over the world...you will still get paid your millions despite your acting."
The Box -smh. No, smhhtetfmm<- shaking my head hard to erase this from my memory. So now I have creepy Frank Langella's half face engrave into my subconscious and a neck brace from THE WHIP LASH OF CONSTANTLY LOOKING BACK AT EJ EXCHANGING 'WTF' FACES. I was hoping that Arlington Steward was indeed a terrorist and that this box was part an intricate plot to shake up ungrateful shopaholic middle
class couples. Your husband works for NASA and you still cant afford to pay for your kid's private school?? Come on now. I was so disappointed with this movie that there aren't even sufficient words. I'll just remain "smhhtetfmm."
So now back to my drawing board, using the above movies as life lessons not to emulate. Then again who knows? One of my scrips might make it on someone's worst list too one day...maybe it'll be one of those 'controvertial good' movies that at least win awards and were fun to write or is just widely disliked by haters who wish they wrote it first. :)
